How can I talk to the girl I have a crush on?

Take her off the pedestal: 

The reason you can't say anything to this girl and think too much what to say is because you feel like you need to impress her and you feel like you need to impress her because you consider her to be superior to you, and you do that because you think her beauty is too mesmerising that when you compare yourself to her. 

You believe that if you wanna say something to her it better the most funny or interesting thing she is ever heard off or she will turn you down faster than you can say “Hello”, but that's not true. 

So take her off the pedestal, treat her like an equal and like she is a human, not a goddess, remember that she, like every other human, also likes to take a huge shit in the bathroom from time to time, as hopefully that will help you realize that she is not that perfect and that if she is not as perfect, then there is no reason for you to believe that you have to say the perfect thing or that you have to be perfect yourself for her to like you. 

Do not seek her approval is what I am saying, don't do or say things that you think she wants you to do or say, just because you think that will make her like you, because the reality is, it will not work.

Observe what she is doing, saying or wearing or what other people are saying, doing or wearing and comment about it: 

If she is has an iPhone you could talk about iPhones and Apple products, if she happens to be texting you could comment about texting habits and how much time you text. 

If she is studying you could comment about what you two want to study after school in college, or what you want to become in the future. If she is talking about a TV show, don't be afraid to talk about the Tv show and aka her questions about it if you haven't seen the tv show. 

If she is dressing in some clothes that you think make her look good, say a compliment about her fashion style, and ask her where she got the talent to dress so well… observe and comment.

Flirt and tease her: 

You could talk all you want with women but unless you flirt and tease her she is only gonna see you as a friend. 

So if you want her as more than a friend you had to flirt in an obvious way, so she notices that you are not just after friendship and tease so that she feels challenge, since girls don't tend to like when someone showers them with compliments all the time and never challenge them by messing with them. 

To tease her you could:

• Pretend like she is annoying you in a playful way.
• Telling her that you two can never be friends in a joking way and with a smile
• Blocking her path in a playful way
• Offering a high 5 and leave her hanging.

To flirt, you need to act like you are romantically interested in her, you do that by acting and talking in suggestive ways, for example: 

• Letting her see you checking her out
• winking her
• playfully touching her
•  playing footsie
• hitting on her
• misinterpreting what she says
• using double meaning jokes and words.

Have confidence and act confident or at least pretend to be confident until you are confident: 

The reason this is important is because if you stutter or are scared of her or of others who hear you talking and flirting with her, or if you doubt too much about what to say or doubt too much touching her then you will just be creepy.

You need to be sure of what you do and not doubt or be scared. You also need to believe that you are good enough for her even if she says something mean que negative about you or puts a weird negative face to you. 

You need to be sure of your own value as a potential lover no matter what, you have to really believe that there is no reason why a girl wouldn't like you, and be able to not get sad or affected by any negative thing others (including her) do or say. 

So if someone tries to be mean to you or piss you off, remember that a confident person doesn't get angry or affected by that, a confident person laughs or ignores in a funny not too serious way.

This is it, this 4 points are all you need to understand to be able to talk to her.

Ernesto Fernandez

Author & Editor

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